Tuesday, November 25, 2008

VLADM summer 08 tour blog - GERMANY




Munich.
Middle Eastern camera shops, used archaic computer parts, sex shows, delis, tobacco shops, old hotels. The club was in a neon hallway outta Xristiane F. through a strip mall in the middle of the city. We found an old Leica camera when they still the Nazi eagle emblem on them in a shop nearby. There was a model train shop across the hall from the club.
The 59 to 1 Club was pretty big. Bad sound. Ian, the promoter/chef there, cooked us a big meal with curried vegetables and celery schnitzel. They also had a Senseo machine, which led me to drink about 10 cups of coffee. We all got pretty drunk, especially Harlan and Nick. The sound was awful, the show was tired, but the music was swirling. Lots of feedback, delay and tone washes. It saved us. Afterwards we sold a bunch of records. The downloads we have for sale seemed to confuse the Germans. The Europeans, all in all, are way more interested in vinyl. But, there's always some chick going on and on about how her parents have a record player, but she doesnt. Nick says, maybe your parents are cooler than you. And I say, then you should buy your daddy one of our records.
The hotel we stayed in smelled like anal sex. Really. Dirty ass fucking. We checked in and went up to our room, only to find a small room with one small bed, no bathroom, no sink and no television. Harlan went down to get a second room and Jeff and I got the key, wandered through the hotel (elaborate, beautifully ancient, but still stinky) and eventually found our room, which had 2 beds, a bathroom & shower, a window with a view of the square and a T.V. We slept late.


MUNICH SETLIST JUNE 4
1 hour
wrong ways
sgt chowder
dub yello house
high numbers
needle to the heart . . .
recovery
that dont make me feel good
getting better
hashishans
creem dreem blues
jai mal aux dents
the hand


We spent the morning looking for a downtown shop, supposedly with hundreds of Bollywood movies that Nick had found the last time he was there. The search led us to a park where my dope senses started to tingle as I watched a group of Middle Eastern dudes make clandestine exchanges. Nick bought a sandwich with a whole entire herring stuffed inside it. I got a crawfish sandwich with Asian slaw and while eating away on it noticed a donut vendor. I ordered a cinnamon one and watched a big, fat German dude stab it down onto a giant syringe that injected applesauce into it. Hot damn! I immediately started yelling for someone, anyone, to come take a look at this shit. Nick was nearby and turned it down at first. But after watching me eat mine, and reluctantly letting him have a bite, he ended up going back to get one.

The drive to Darmstadt led us through the Black Forest, dark clouds, and an unusual amount of traffic. We are trying to decrease our amount of stuff as much as possible before Switzerland, so there was a lot of cigarettes being smoked along the way. I started to feel sick in the van, so I melted away into my headphones. But they were so huge and ill-fitting that they began to give me a headache, and in turn my tooth started throbbing again. It's like a little man is dying inside my mouth. We listened to an Alex Jones podcast that Jeff had with him and drove on in to Darmstadt.
Very quiet, narrow streets. Eerily quiet. Some parts of the town reminded me of Southern California for some reason. Semi-rural coastal towns like Palos Verdes. The club was actually a music school built in 1835 and used as “alternative schooling” since the War. The room we played in was down a flight of stairs in a dark, stone cavern with several dark arched hallways, a bar and the room with the stage, which was once a swimming pool nestled down in this stone dungeon. Voodoo Kong opened for us. They were awful, but the drummer wore a monkey mask. He was similar in stature to Ian S. or Bobby Conn. But he couldnt save his shitty band. Our show was lackadaisical at best. But Nick seemed to enjoy it. If theres one thing about Nick, he realizes the value of entertainment and will give %100 of himself even if its a tired night or, even worse, a tired crowd. I dont know if he learned this from Jeff Evans in '68 or if he's always had this sense of duty. Either way, its very deeply ingrained. Again, the crowd bought a ton of records. One guy asked me what album Creem Dreem Blues was on. And although all my CDRs arent ready, I havent been able to reduce and copy the cover so I can sell them.
After the show we sat and talked to Roman, from Redondo Beat, for a long while. I gave him a Teledildonics CDR. Cool dude, he reminded me a little of Greg Faison from the Antique Curtains, etc. Roman is going to try to make it to Memphis for GonerFest.






DARMSTADT SETLIST JUNE 5 @ BESSUNGER KNABENSCHULE
dub s.s.
1 hour
wrong ways
hashishans
sgt chowder
recovery
dub yellow house
high numbers
creem dreem blues
getting better
that dont make me feel good
jai mal aux dents
- - - -
to the park
push and pull
new real politik






After saying so long to Roman, we drove a couple miles to the place we were staying for the night. To our amazement, it was a massive, stone castle with a garden, stone paths, gargoyles and a general “haunted vibe.” We were all pretty wasted, especially Jeff, once we made it up to our room on the second floor. Apparently, the castle had been abandoned and is now run as a co-op with government funding. This seems to be common over here, but obviously very rare in the states, where our taxes mostly go the the military and politically motivated blowjobs. Our bedroom was large, but there was a nest of spiders behind my bed. So I moved to a set of mattresses stacked up on top of each other in the center of the room, which led to several Princess and the Pea comments that got real old real quicklike. Nick and I both thought that when the spiders marched on me in the night, their theme should be Joe Meek. Prolly March of the Globbots. Harlan rolled up the rest of Jeff's stuff and we went out to the garden to smoke. We stood on the winding, iron staircase and got super crazy. I had a big, black blanket wrapped around my head and felt like Count Dracula. Harlan and I wondered how old the castle must have been and what weird events must have transpired there over time. There's a large part of European history that is based on lineage. Some count or lord built this place or his family and his descendants. It's not like that in the US. Americans dont think that far ahead.
I wanted to go for a walk, but was way too tired at that point. But Harlan went for a stroll out in the darkness and came back really spooked. He said he had felt like the guy in the horror movie who was about to get whacked, only he didnt know it but the audience did. He said, “Brendan, youre educated. What do you know about German history? Back in the B.C.?” And I turned my head and said, “Well Harlan, in the B.C.?” And he said, “Yep.” And I said, “the 'Before Coconuts' time?” And he said, “Exactly.” So I went on, “It all started with the Visi-Goths, a roaming group of barbarians obsessed with blackness and Bauhaus. That's actually how painted, black nails came into fashion later.
“The rest of European culture had advanced very far. The Romans subjugated the German tribes.”
Harlan asked me, “Who fought the Visi-Goths?”
I pensively paused for a second and replied, “The 49ers. With lazerguns.”
Nick piped in, “They had a great quarterback that year.”
I continued, “Europe was eventually united through German ingenuity by a series of pneumatic tubes and tunnels that were used to transport goods and foodstuffs. That's actually how WWII got started, because of the lack of air pressure in Germany.”
“And that leads us up to today,” I finished.
My story had lulled everyone to sleep. German History 101.








The next morning Nick and I went over to a park between the music school and the castle and ran around the grounds surrounding this giant house. I have no idea who lived there or what kind of building it was. A government house or a museum of some sort maybe. But the park was great and it was warm and sunny. We took a bunch of photos and then hit the road.












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